Budget Funerals
For The Impoverished or Generally Tightfisted

 
 

Budget funeral fleet

 
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  • Making life's final journey cheaper than other people's •

QUALITY OLD HEARSES

Tenpasenta
Quality old cars
 
   
R.I.P.
  Tenpasenta Church  

COLLECTION VANS

Tenpasenta
Some believe that even a Budget funeral deserves quality transport, and at the Tenpasenta Church Budget Funerals Division we deliver just that.
Our fleet of five vintage funerary vehicles have been specially selected to meet our Budget funeral customers limited pockets.
The cars date back to 1964, and were part of our very first funeral fleet here in Southampton, some things are just too good to throw away, we even found a forgotten body that had mummified in one!mummy
If you opt for our Budget funeral service, one of our discreet body collections vans will be with you within 8 hours (2 mile radius of Woolston). This is a Man & Van service, you will need to assist our operative in his duties, extra staff are available at £30 per person, £60 per person for collections of the dearly departed higher than two floors.
Budget collection van

DELIVERY HEARSES

Tenpasenta
Quality old cars
Budget hearse can be washed by you. Coffin transport from our Budget chapel of rest to the Budget Church is included in tier 2 funeral plans, this will be in one of our beautifully maintained VDP Princess hearses, the 200 yard trip usually takes 2 minutes, but this does depend on how many mourners are able or willing to push.

Extra charges are applicable if you wish to use our hearse as transport to the funeral pyres or over ground burial sites, ask our staff for the latest cash only prices on the day.
All of our vintage cars can be fully valeted on the day of the funeral service, our gates open at 8am, help yourself to water but bring your own bucket and sponge.

Super basic. You can borrow our wheelbarrow for free, this has proven to be a very popular choice for council funded funerals and Irish labourers. Please return the barrow to where you found it. CryptAdvisor
Quality old cars
   
R.I.P.
   
  Tenpasenta Church  
RENT-A-HEARSE
Tenpasenta
Rent-A-Hearse

Shit Happens
Rent our luxurious Daimler Hearse for only £70 per hour!
Keeping prices low with subtle behaviorally targeted sponsorship.

DELIVER BY BICYCLE
Tenpasenta
Why not try our tandem bicycle as demonstrated by the vicars.
This could bring a touch of class or just novelty value to a mundane trip to the grave or pyres.
Prices start at £20 for an hour, which is pretty good. You will need to provide your own riders as this is not as much fun as it looks, and our multi millionaire vicars are not very likely to attend a low fee event.
Maximum weight for this service is 25 stone, the bicycle is old and there are a couple of hills to negotiate. Shit Happens
Vicars on tandem hearse
     
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Tenpasenta Limited Registered in England 08577852

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